u love me???

okay...wow;* ol dude just told me he loved me...again...

The first time he said it, i swear i threw me off a lil bit cuz I was not expecting it so I kinda brushed it off as if I didnt hear it.  I have a question for yall...why is it that most people are looking for love..but love always finds you in the wrong people? I mean dont get me wrong...ol dude is cool but he comes with some baggage...

      - 2 boys, and twin girls =  4 kids

      - && he's 30...

I know..I'm 21...not a huuuuge gap..but big enough. Men at that age are ready to settle down and play house..want wifey && i'm just not ready for that much responsibility. Because to me personally those arent my kids..i dnt wanna be a stepmommy.....point blank period

so where do u draw the line??

Cio, thats his nickname...he is really cute and a really good catch besides the fact that he has kids....&& for him to say that he loves me now is something big that I have to address..
So tonight I asked him why does he love me...and I explained to him that there is a huuuge difference between saying you "like someone alot" and "loving" somebody.

Love is a lifetime...Like is seasonal..

...BIG DIFFERENCE!

Sometimes when I talk to Cio I feel like I am the older one and he is the child....and it was just all fun and games until he dropped the L Bomb...cuz I like him but I definitely know that i dont love him...so do i tell him? or keep going on as if nothing was said...so now I'm stuck with a question...

Should I continue on with this "affair" or give it up??

RiP My Soulmate

I completely forgot...&& I really feel ashamed;* The love of my life passed away 4 months ago...yesterday && I didn't remember. I really hope that he does not fade from my memory && I really want to keep him alive...in my mind at least.


Adrian Dominique Davis, died from a gun shot wound to the chest on March 22nd, 2011 at approx 10:45 pm. 


Although me and Adrian have not been together for two years, I know deep down in my heart that he was the one for me. In fact, as I am writing this blog....i shed tears for him. It has been hard for me to get  up the courage to visit his grave, because I try not to think about his passing. In fact, it's still rather hard for me to believe that he is dead and gone. I miss him soooo much...


And it's kinda funny, I would rather not think of him as being "gone", but I want to keep him alive....its something terrible...*sighs*


MY heart is so heavy...it literally takes my breath away;* somebody as sweet and as thoughtful as Adrian to have been taking by someone consumed by the devil...He did not deserve that, NO ONE deserves to die like that. With in the next week, I vow to visit my sweet love and let him know how much I love him and how much I miss him.










.......but i'm pretty sure he already knows...because I know..he's watching me <3

garlic&herbs!

This is day #4 of my diet, it definitely is a struggle....i almost hate it. BUTi did vow to eat healthier and to exercise more often. So tonight, I decided to cook dinner......mind you I am definitely NOT a good cook but I did indeed try my best....&& it was delicious! I marinated chicken wings in some homemade garlic and herb seasoning and baked it in the oven. Along with the chicken I cooked corn on the cob, string beans, and for a little something extra.....garlic bread :)

the biggggg color chop!

I have been talking FOREVER about cutting my hair...&& i really wanted to go bald...because...

bald is beautiful! :)

fresh cut!

But you could say that I'ma semi-baldie! However I am very happy with my choice..this is like the best haircut I've ever had...i even colored it a little...i soooo cant contain my excitement...! Lately I have been feeling a little down...seems liek I was trying to seep into some type of depression. I desperately needed excitement in my life. So for about the past week...I kept telling my mother that I was gonna chop it all off && finally on July 19th around 10:30 pm....it was the biggggggg chop!

&& so I thought to myself..why not take it a step further....add some color...even though this wasn't what I was going for I am loving it! :)

ENJ0Y! <3

the big chop...<3

Honey blonde hair color! :)

sheer bliss!